The written word is a very powerful thing. It has brought down presidents. People have done great good and great evil through their writing. I don’t take it lightly. Writing is an art. Some artists are better than others. The picture that accompanies this blog was taken the day I retired from the National Institutes of Health in 2011, and I am holding some of the awards I’ve won over my career.
I respect my chosen career enough to know that I am no longer capable of practicing it at the level I would wish. I have given people who hate me far too many opportunities to mock me and downplay my abilities. In other words, I can not only not hit the high, inside fast ball any more… I can’t even see it.
Was a time, as long as we’re going to use the baseball metaphor, when I could see the pitcher’s fingers on the laces of the ball when he let go, and I could anticipate the pitch based on that alone. Now, I can barely see the pitcher. Metaphorically.
I’m missing things that a writer who has accomplished things I’ve accomplished in my body of work should never miss. For instance, it took WJJ Hoge of all people, to make me realize that I had all the information I needed about Ali Akbar’s car right there on the speeding ticket he received. It never occurred to me to check it! A year ago, I would never have missed such an obvious clue. It took a bloviating idiot, mocking my inability to hit the high, hot one, to open my eyes to how far I’ve slipped in the past year.
The one thing I value about myself is my honesty. I’m not always right. But I can state that I have never written a story with the intention to deceive. If I have been wrong, whenever that was pointed out and proven, I have always issued a correction.
I had to retire in 2011 because I was unable to manage the commute. But we also knew that my ability to process facts and keep them organized would eventually suffer from this condition. And I have certainly reached that point.
I am not shutting down the blog. I expect to keep writing about the Kimberlin lawsuits and my own legal battles against the taunting comic book supervillain evil of WJJ Hoge and his tiny band of followers. They are free to say whatever they want about me. I know what I’ve done in my life, and as I look back I do so with very few regrets.
The headline indicates my gift to each of you. As I have clearly been affected by the common late stage Parkinson’s “executive dysfunction” disorder, I issue you each a grain of salt for you to take whenever you read something I’ve written. I’m not going to do any more investigating, and least I don’t believe I will. If I do, I will have a friend double and triple check my facts before I publish.
I can no longer trust my own judgement on some of these matters. And my detractors love pointing out when I misspell a word, let alone when I get a fact incorrect. They are going to say whatever they are going to say, and frankly, I don’t give a good God damn.
I need to step away from the plate, hang up the cleats and watch the game as a spectator, not as a player.
I have too much respect for journalism to willingly abuse it. I will continue to run my little Internet radio stations and write for entertainment purposes. But I can no longer expect, or ask, anyone to take what I write as fact.
God bless, and thanks.
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